Since making the decision to put him down, I've been going out to see Dollar a bit more. And I think he's enjoying the bonus attention, but also likes to make me pull my hair out and make me sad at the same time.
When I went down there on Monday to see him for a couple minutes (I had V with me and nobody was home), I put V in the house while she was sleeping and went into the pasture to see him. Now Dollar is pretty content in pasture, but when he saw me, he started ambling his was back to the gate because in his train of thought, when Mom shows up, it's time to work. He did let me pet him a little bit, before marching off toward the gate and just standing there waiting for me and basically going, "Mom's here, work time!" I felt so bad telling him that he no longer has to work. He looked a bit dejected :(
Eating trees
My Old Man leading the way to the gate, followed closely by Mars
Then, when I went down today, I was with my niece and nephew, so they came with me to get him from the pasture and bring him up to the barn so that I could pamper him a bit. He seemed to enjoy that, and also toted the kids around a little bit. At least I can take solace in the fact that my Old Man can still haul the kids around, even if it's not real work for him.
Well, since the decision was made about Dollar, I've been humming and hawing over what to do with all my tack. I have 2 saddles (1 Western and 1 English), 2 bridles (Western and English), grooming tools, halters, etc.
I talked with Keith and decided to keep all my tack. I may look into getting another horse in a couple years (when I don't have a little kid(s) demanding all my time) and that way I don't have to re-buy all my stuff and spend a whack-load of money.
Sigh. And now everyone is having their spring sales and as much as I want to go a buy stuff for Dollar, I know it's pointless. Sheesh. Why does this have to be so hard??
Oh, and for this blog. I've decided to leave it up as a memoriam to Dollar and (maybe) start up a different horse blog for any that I ride and any possible future horse.
So I got some not good news from my Dad today about Dollar. He had the vet down sometime last week to pull wolf teeth on the youngsters and had him check out Dollar because it seems as though his Heaves are getting worse. Well, the vet checked him, had Sam jog him in hand, and checked him again. Turns out that he only has about 1/4 of his lungs left to use (the tail end of his lungs), the rest has totally congealed (basically turned to meat) and that I'd probably have to put him down by summer-time, otherwise he might not make it through summer.
Sigh. Not the news I wanted to hear, ande especially not now. I was hoping that he'd make it at least until 25 and that V would be able to ride him. I felt so bad for him and I know it's selfish of me, but part of me really wants to keep him around. The other (logical) part of me knows that it's time for him to go, that he's lead a good life and needs to be free of his pain.
Luckily Hubs was there when my Dad told me this, and while I was crying away, he just looked at me and told me to saddle up Dollar. Which at first didn't make sense to me as I had just ridden him before getting this news, but then it clicked it. He was gonna let me take V for her first ride on Dollar.
So needless to say, I went back into the pasture to get him, with the niece and nephew following me and calling for him. He didn't seem impressed that he'd have to work again, but still came and let my niece ride him back to the barn.
Put my Western saddle on him, hopped on and then got V on with me. And off we went....
Dollar just walked ever so slowly while I held V as we rode. Sigh. Just tearing up looking at the video again. Dollar did awesome with her (duh, when is he not awesome?!?!) and even backed up and spun with her. Such a good Old Man.
Me and Keith decided later in the evening that we'll wait until after his 20th birthday in June to put him down. I know it's selfish, but I want him to see his 20th before he goes to greener pastures. I basically spent the rest of the evening in tears.
We went down to my Dad’s for supper and got there early enough that I could get a quick ride in on Dollar. So I made sure that V was fed and then ran to the back to get in a quick ride. Gave him a quick grooming, tacked up, hopped on and did some work at the walk/trot with some collection and bending in there to mix it up for him. I tried to get him to canter a bit, but he was dragging his lazy but, so I decided not to push for it. He was being really willing, so I was just happy with that. After I was done riding, I gave Madison a ride and had to bargain with her to get her off. She’d stay on her horse all day if she could.
Once I got her off, I decided to do some ground work with Dollar, making him do his showmanship stuff, but without me holding him. And good thing I had my crop with me as he needed some reminders about what I was asking him to do and being stubborn about it. He was being lazy when I asked him to jog beside me, but after a “reminder” all of a suddenly we remembered what we were supposed to be doing. Same thing with the pivoting. After a couple minutes of doing this, I had him beside me (without me holding him), going up and down the arena, doing what I was doing, when I asked him to do it. Yeah!
